Sunday, April 19, 2015

# 4 JINXED


…following from # 3 JINXED

147 INT. OLIVER'S SERVICED APARTMENT. NIGHT

OLIVER leads VENUS into his serviced apartment.   

OLIVER
Now you just make yourself at home, Josie, and stay as long as you need to get yourself back on your feet.

The sound of Josie's mobile phone ringing.

148 INT. VENUS' BEDROOM. OLIVER'S APARTMENT NIGHT

VENUS picks up Josie's mobile as she boots up her computer.

VENUS
Hello.

JOSEPHINE SENIOR (telephone)
Darling heart, I've got Rodney here from the Royal Shakespeare. He just wants to…

VENUS mimics Josie's British accent.

VENUS
Mum, I don't want to hurt your feelings but really acting's not…not…my cup of tea.
The 'desktop' of Venus' computer suddenly goes crazy - files opening and closing, icons flashing etc. VENUS is shocked, slips back into her Australian accent.

VENUS
Shit! Someone's trying to hack into my fucking computer.

VENUS remembers that she is talking to Josie's mum, reverts to a British accent.

VENUS
A line from a play I auditioned for…gotta go, mum.

The distinctive sound of Venus's mobile phone ringing - Mendelsohn’s Wedding March.

149 INT. KITCHEN. RANDY'S HOUSE

Mendelsohn’s Wedding March continues over. DELORES in the kitchen, looks for the ringing mobile. In the background, on a patio by a swimming pool, RANDY, JOSIE and LARRY stand at a table upon which rests their catered dinner. DELORES sees the bum bag Notch gave Josie, moves across the kitchen, opens it.

150 INT. OLIVER'S BEDROOM. NIGHT

OLIVER looks at his laptop, smiles as Venus' Home Page opens:
Venus, masked and naked but for a python wrapped around her body strategically.

151 EXT. PATIO BY SWIMMING POOL. NIGHT

JOSIE, RANDY and LARRY sit down to a sumptuous meal. DELORES approaches, Venus' pink mobile in her hand.

DELORES
Is this yours, Serena?

JOSIE tries to cover her shock; not sure if she should acknowledge ownership or not.

DELORES
Says she's Venus' mother…and Rhonda's! You have two sisters?

JOSIE takes the mobile from DELORES.

JOSIE (smiles)
Thank you, Delores.

JOSIE takes the mobile walks to the edge of the pool. LARRY, besotted by Josie, turns to RANDY.

LARRY
Can she act?

JOSIE whispers into the mobile, using Venus' voice.

JOSIE
Mum, can I call you back?

152 INT. VENUS' BEDROOM. OLIVER'S APARTMENT NIGHT

VENUS stares in horror at the turbulence on her computer screen. Josie's mobile rings. VENUS picks it up.

JOSIE'S VOICE
Venus, you've got to call your mother immediately. It's urgent!

VENUS is about to say something but Josie hangs up. VENUS shakes her head, looks at her computer screen.

153 EXT. PATIO BY SWIMMING POOL. NIGHT

JOSIE, RANDY and DELORES eat a sumptuous meal. Venus’ pink mobile rests on the table alongside JOSIE. LARRY,closeby, films with a small video camera as JOSIE addresses her dinner companions in the manner of a tour guide.

JOSIE
So, we fly to Darwin first thing...

154 INT. OLIVER'S BEDROOM. NIGHT

OLIVER looks at Venus' Home Page. Through speakers attached to his computer:

JOSIE’S VOICE
...in the morning and I've organized a tour of Kakadu.

155 SPLIT SCREEN: INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE/ VENUS' ROOM. NIGHT

MARY stands beside PHYLLIS - who smiles beatifically.

MARY
Mum’s wondering when the Lord is going to provide?

VENUS
I wish she’d ask the Lord herself? Tell her...

The file Venus has tried to open before (distinctive red icon), opens: PRIME MINISTER OF AUSTRALIA - confidential.

MARY
Tell her...tell her...Shit!

As the file opens there is a knock on the door. VENUS flips the lid of her computer shut.

156 EXT. PATIO BY SWIMMING POOL. NIGHT

JOSIE, RANDY, LARRY and DELORES have finished dinner. As JOSIE leans close to LARRY to refill RANDY'S champagne glass, LARRY, filming, notices JOSIE'S pink-haired armpits. 

LARRY
Goddamn! I never seen a woman before with pink underarm hair.

JOSIE
Randy likes pink body hair, don't you Randy?

LARRY
She's not pink…down below as well, is she, son?

JOSIE
Yes she is, Larry. “My pink pussy.” That's what Randy says when he talks dirty.

157 INT. VENUS' BEDROOM. NIGHT

OLIVER, apologetic, addresses VENUS.
VENUS
Darwin!? Why Darwin?

OLIVER
Um…can't say Josie. But you can stay here and…

VENUS
Oh, can I come with you?

OLIVER
Can't do that, Josie.

VENUS
I thought you thought I was beautiful?

OLIVER
Yes, but…there are reasons…

VENUS (seductive)
Wouldn't you like to find out how beautiful I am…on the inside?

158 EXT. PATIO BY SWIMMING POOL. NIGHT

JOSIE
Pink is Randy's favourite colour, Larry. He loves all my pink bits, don't you, Randy?

LARRY'S eyes are focused on the small video screen. DELORES, not wishing to be upstaged, takes her tank-top off to reveal her ample bosom, barely contained in a pink uplift brassiere.

DELORES
Anyone for a swim?

DELORES steps out of her skirt, revealing a bottom, framed by skimpy pink thong underwear. She stands at the edge of the pool just long enough for them all to get a good look at her body (and for LARRY to refocus his camera) before diving in.

159 INT. PLANE. DAY

VENUS, a colorful scarf wrapped around her head, sits alongside OLIVER - her brow creased with worry.  OLIVER, smiles at VENUS. Her smile in return is polite, forced.

Meanwhile, at the other end of the plane, LARRY, dressed like Mick Dundee, sits alongside RANDY, whilst DELORES sits in the seats behind with JOSIE, who is wearing her brunette wig. 

LARRY (to Randy)
Delores is hot, son! Hot. Best sex I've had in years.

DELORES (to Josie)
Even with half a bottle of Viagra Larry's...well, I’d get more satisfaction from a limp stick of celery.

160 INT. LUGGAGE CAROUSEL DARWIN AIRPORT. DAY

JOSIE, waiting for her luggage is shocked to see OLIVER standing amidst passengers opposite her, waiting for his luggage. JOSIE quickly puts on sunglasses, turns her back, heads for:   

161 INT. AIRPORT BATHROOM. DAY

JOSIE, Venus' pink mobile phone at her ear, walks into a toilet cubicle, closes the door.

JOSIE
Brandon, it's me, Serena...I mean Josie...I'm back in town and there's some really weird, spooky stuff going on, Call me HOLEY FUCKING MOLEY…!!!

Through a crack in the door JOSIE sees VENUS, in a colorful headscarf, checking her make-up in front of the mirror.

VENUS removes her head scarf to reveal short pink hair identical to Josie's.

JOSIE, whose own pink hair is covered with a wig, reacts with shock; watches VENUS walk out of the bathroom.

162 INT. LUGGAGE CAROUSEL DARWIN AIRPORT. DAY

JOSIE walks to the luggage carousel, looking around nervously. She is just about to grab her backpack when VENUS appears in frame to grab her own bag. VENUS, facing away from JOSIE (she would only have to turn slightly to see her), places her bag at her side and presses keys on her mobile - which is, in fact Josie's. JOSIE'S mobile (which is, in fact, Venus') begins to ring inside her bum-bag.

VENUS waits impatiently for her call to be answered. JOSIE, terrified, ignores her own (Venus's!) phone as Mendelsohhn's Wedding March plays.  From where she is standing VENUS can hear the faint sound of Mendelsohhn's tune and looks around to find its source. Before she sees JOSIE, however, she connects with who she was calling and is distracted:

VENUS
Its Josie Higgenbottom. Confirming my booking for tonight…thanks.

VENUS hangs up, picks up her bag, walks towards the 'Exit'.

JOSIE  answers her (Venus’) phone.

BRANDON'S VOICE
Babe, whose phone...!? Are you OK?

JOSIE
Can't talk now. I'll…

BRANDON' VOICE
Where are you staying?

JOSIE
Hotel called the 'Top End'.

163 EXT. AIRPORT. DAY

JOSIE, in sunglasses, walks tentatively from the terminal to where RANDY introduces LARRY and DELORES to the TOUR GUIDE, who has his back to JOSIE; his long hair neatly tied behind his head in a pony tail. LARRY shakes the TOUR GUIDE'S hand.

LARRY
Pleased to meet you, buddy.

JOSIE recognizes the TOUR GUIDE as NOTCH - clean-shaven and wearing a neat khaki uniform with ADVENTURE TOURS emblazoned on his shirt. JOSIE hides behind RANDY.

RANDY
And Delores, Larry's…

            DELORES                                    LARRY
       Daughter…                                         Sweetheart…

LARRY is a little taken aback. DELORES smiles at NOTCH.

DELORES
Just joking, Larry…

RANDY puts an arm around JOSIE'S shoulder, pulls her into view.

RANDY
…and this is my sweetheart, Serena.

As NOTCH turns and smiles at JOSIE, not recognizing her, DELORES leans over to take something from her carry bag.

NOTCH
Serena…

DELORES looks up at NOTCH, smiles. NOTCH'S eyes focus on DELORES' cleavage.

JOSIE takes off her sunglasses, holds out her hand.

JOSIE
And you'd be…

NOTCH, recognizing her now, stares at JOSIE; lost for words.

RANDY
Bruce Cockburn. Our tour guide.

JOSIE  (smiles)
Pleased to meet you, Bruce Cock Burn.


164 INT. TOUR BUS. ROAD. DAY

As NOTCH drives the ADVENTURE TOURS vehicle past the 'Top End' hotel (the sign clearly identifiable), JOSIE makes her way towards him.

NOTCH
OK, folks! The itinerary for this tour is…there's no itinerary, so you won't be sleeping here at the Top End tonight…

NOTCH indicates the hotel with a wave. JOSIE appears at his side; looks back at 'The Top End' as it disappears from view.

JOSIE
But…

NOTCH
…but under the stars. If its movie locations you want, you've come to the right man…

NOTCH lowers his voice a little.

NOTCH
What can I do you for, 'Serena'?

JOSIE
I can explain.

NOTCH
Yeah! Like causing grievous bodily harm to Madge and Reg at the Desert Palms?

JOSIE
What are you talking about?

NOTCH
And having the FBI wanting to 'take you out of the loop' for hacking into the Pentagon computer?

JOSIE is about to say something when RANDY appears, drapes his arm around her shoulders; kisses her on the cheek.

RANDY
Bruce, buddy, good to have you on board.

NOTCH looks at RANDY'S arm, draped around JOSIE'S shoulder, raises his eyebrows, makes brief eye contact with JOISE.

165 INT. 'TOP END' HOTEL RECEPTION. DAY

VENUS and OLIVER walk through the foyer to ‘Reception’. OLIVER, talking on his mobile phone, hesitates for a moment to speak in private. VENUS continues on to the desk - to be greeted by a smiling CONCIERGE.

CONCIERGE
Good afternoon. Name?

VENUS
Josie Higgenbottom...I mean...

VENUS is unsure what name to give. The CONCIERGE looks at her with his frozen smile for a moment before OLIVER steps up and slaps his credit card on the desk.

166 EXT. KAKADU NATIONAL PARK. DAY

The tour bus speeds past the KAKADU NATIONAL PARK entrance. Dark clouds loom ominously is the sky; thunder is heard.

NOTCH (voice over)
…The rainy seasons still with us, so we're going to encounter a bit of mud along the way. Hope none of you are allergic to dirt.

167 INT. HOTEL ROOM. DAY

OLIVER opens French doors onto a patio overlooking the ocean. 

VENUS, her nerves ragged, pops a pill into her mouth and washes it down with a whisky (on ice) from the mini-bar.

OLIVER turns, looks at the whisky in one of VENUS' hands - her other kneading the tense muscles in her neck.

OLIVER
What you need's a good massage. May I?

He moves close to VENUS, hands raised. She is not so sure.

OLIVER
You can trust me, Josie. I'm a qualified masseuse.

VENUS nods tentatively. OLIVER kneads her neck muscles. VENUS lets out a sigh of relief.

VENUS
That feels good, Oliver, Very good.

OLIVER
If you want a proper massage…?

VENUS
Yes, thank you Oliver, but I need a bath first. Do you mind?

168 INT. HOTEL RECEPTION. DAY

BRANDON at Reception - his motor bike parked outside. The CONCIERGE checks his books.

CONCIERGE
Yes, Mr Higgenbottom your, cousin...Josephine...Josie...has checked into room 315.

169 EXT. CROCODILE TOUR BOAT. DAY

JOSIE stands alone at the front of a Tour Boat. A white-clothed food-laden table has been set up at the stern.

RANDY pours champagne for LARRY and DELORES as NOTCH walks up holding a bottle of maple syrup - which he hands to JOSIE.

NOTCH
Brought this along for you especially, 'Serena'. For you and Randy. In case he decides he wants to surprise you!

JOSIE
He's not my boyfriend!

DELORES walks up, a glass of champagne in her hand.

NOTCH
Delores, mate, you're a woman, right…

DELORES
You're not the first man who's noticed that, Bruce.

NOTCH
Right. Well, what would you say about a bloke who didn't know how to surprise a woman with a bottle of maple syrup?

DELORES
That he didn't have a romantic bone in his body.

NOTCH is taken aback. JOSIE smiles triumphantly.

DELORES
Have you got a romantic bone, Bruce?

NOTCH
Ummmm…

DELORES (purring)
Wouldn't you like it if some gorgeous woman crept into your bedroom and saw you asleep on the bed naked in the warm afternoon sun and poured warm golden maple syrup all over your big manly…

LARRY (shouts)
Crocodile! A biggie!Is that a freshwater or saltwater Croc, Bruce?

NOTCH heads back to the stern, closely followed by RANDY.

DELORES (to Josie)
Isn't Bruce gorgeous? Thank God there's at least man on this trip whose bone I wouldn't mind in my body…

170 INT. BATHROOM/BEDROOM. DAY

VENUS, lying in a hot soapy bath, sips another Scotch on ice. She is a little tipsy. On the other side of the door (which is slightly ajar) OLIVER sits nursing a Scotch also.

VENUS
I kissed a boy once, when I was fifteen, but...

OLIVER
But?

VENUS
It made me feel...vulnerable. And I didn't like it.

OLIVER
I understand.

VENUS
You do!

OLIVER
Sure.

171 EXT. PATHWAY TO LOOKOUT. LATE AFTERNOON

NOTCH guides the group along a pathway that opens out onto a vast and magnificent Kakadu view, JOSIE talks with DELORES.

DELORES
Between you and me? I'm getting paid to be Larry's 'girlfriend'.

JOSIE  
Randy's paying me too! But I don't…you know… have sex with him!

DELORES
And I don't have sex with Larry.

172 INT. HOTEL ROOM. DAY

VENUS, in a hotel bathrobe, emerges from the bathroom. OLIVER sits on the edge of the bed sipping his drink.

VENUS
Weird, ay, to have a phobia about kissing? The very thought...ugh...

VENUS heads for the mini-bar to pour herself another drink.

OLIVER
I like your ‘weirdness’.

173 EXT. PATHWAY TO LOOKOUT. LATE AFTERNOON

JOSIE and DELORES walk and talk.

JOSIE
So you never…, you know...with Larry!?

DELORES
Share bodily fluids. Never. 

DELORES nods in the direction of NOTCH, who is walking a little in front of them, talking with LARRY and RANDY

DELORES
But I'd share them with him any day.

174 INT. HOTEL ROOM. DAY

VENUS and OLIVER sit on the bed - each of them knocking back their drinks with gusto.

VENUS (smiles)
I've never talked to anyone about...this kind of stuff before.


OLIVER
Takes trust to reveal your secret self.

VENUS sips her drink nervously, looks at OLIVER. Their eyes meet. VENUS looks away, takes a gulp of her drink.

OLIVER
What I like most about you, Josie, is you speak your mind. I like that. No BS. Most people lie about who they really are. Pretend to be someone they’re not.

VENUS smiles.

OLIVER
I've been waiting all my life to find a woman that I can trust with my true self. The REAL ME!

VENUS (laughs)
And who is the real Oliver?

OLIVER (excited)
You really want to know?

VENUS (laughs)
Yes.

OLIVER looks at VENUS for a moment, makes a decision.

OLIVER
Wait right here.

OLIVER leaps to his feet.

175 EXT. SUNSET VIEWING PLACE. SUNSET

NOTCH stands with JOSIE holding a tray with wine-filled glasses and a bowl of olives. RANDY and LARRY, in the background, set a video camera up on a tripod to get a shot of the sunset. A little to one side of them, DELORES sits by herself, a note-book in her hand.

NOTCH
Couldn’t figure out whether his name was Oliver or Quentin, but then I don’t think he could figure out whether he was Arthur or Martha but...anyhow, he’s looking for you so he can ‘take you out of the loop’

JOSIE
Take me out of the loop! What does that mean?

NOTCH runs his finger across his throat.

JOSIE
Why would the FBI want to kill me!?

NOTCH
Threat to national security it seems.

176 INT. HOTEL BEDROOM. SUNSET

VENUS finishes her Scotch, yawns, flicks through TV channels with the 'remote', stopping on a music one - its romantic sound track lulling her into a half-sleep.

177 EXT. SUNSET VIEWING PLACE. SUNSET

JOSIE confronts NOTCH, unaware of the approach of RANDY behind her.

JOSIE
I am not Randy's girlfriend…

RANDY drapes his arm around JOSIE'S shoulder.

RANDY
Darling, can you believe this view?  Dad's wondering…

JOSIE
Dad!! Larry's your father!?

RANDY
Yes, and he thinks you're perfect to play the lead in Thunder Downunder!

JOSIE
I can't act.

RANDY
Had me fooled with your schoolgirl striptease!

JOSIE
But…

NOTCH shakes his head, walks towards DELORES and LARRY.

178 INT. HOTEL BEDROOM. SUNSET

VENUS, lying on her tummy, dozes on the bed. BRANDON, in cowboy clothes and hat, enters the room through the French doors, makes his way across the room towards her, a bottle of maple syrup in his hand.

179 EXT. SUNSET VIEWING PLACE. SUNSET

LARRY talks to DELORES as NOTCH approaches. 

LARRY
That Serena…She's got the looks, the body…AND she can act! And this location, Bruce! It's perfect! 

180 INT. HOTEL BEDROOM. SUNSET

BRANDON finishes removing his cowboy outfit, stands naked by the bed. (Discretely and inoffensively naked, dear Reader!)He begins to massage VENUS' neck. She half awakens:

VENUS
Mmmm…

181 INT. HOTEL BEDROOM. SUNSET

BRANDON takes the top off a bottle of Maple Syrup, places it on the table beside the bed, slides VENUS' bathrobe down a little to expose her shoulders and the upper back.

VENUS, quite tipsy, smiles but does not open her eyes.

VENUS
Mmmmm…

182 EXT. SUNSET VIEWING PLACE. SUNSET

JOSIE, hands on hips, confronts Randy.

JOSIE
The answer is no. N...O

RANDY
You'd rather be an apprentice fashion designer than star in a movie!?

JOSIE
Yes.

183 INT. HOTEL BEDROOM. SUNSET

BRANDON massages VENUS' shoulders. She purrs with delight. He picks up the bottle of Maple Syrup and pour some of it on VENUS' back.  VENUS, her eyes still closed, giggles.

184 EXT. SUNSET VIEWING PLACE. SUNSET

RANDY pleads with JOSIE.

RANDY
Promise you'll think about it before you make a decision. (JOSIE NODS RELUCTANTLY) Don't look now, but dad's looking at us.

JOSIE
And…!?

RANDY
Could I get that kiss now?

JOSIE sees NOTCH, sitting beside DELORES; flirting with her.

RANDY
For dad's sake

JOSIE notices NOTCH turn to look at her and RANDY.

JOSIE
OK.

RANDY kisses JOSIE more passionately than she would like. 

CLOSE ON: NOTCH, who has watched the first part of the kiss, turning back to DELORES, who is writing in a note-book.

DELORES
…Ever since I was a little girl I've made up stories…

NOTCH laughs. DELORES turns, kisses him impulsively on the cheek as JOSIE watches over RANDY'S shoulder.

185 INT. HOTEL BEDROOM. SUNSET

BRANDON massages Maple Syrup into VENUS' back. She enjoys the massage, purring with pleasure. She sniffs. A thought occurs to her. She opens her eyes, turns to look at her masseuse.  At the same moment that OLIVER walks into the room wearing pink thong knickers, a pink bra, a pink silk gown and with his face made up. VENUS, BRANDON and OLIVER scream in unison.

186 INT. 'TOP END' HOTEL FOYER. SUNSET

OLIVER (in pink underwear), VENUS (in a bathrobe) and BRANDON (bloody nose and trying to clip his cowboy trousers back on) are ejected from the foyer by Security Guards. Men and women wearing CHRISTIANS FOR A BETTER WORLD name-tags look on.

187 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

The remnants of dinner lie scattered by the dying embers of the fire. JOSIE, NOTCH and DELORES sit by the fire.

DELORES opens her note-book, flicks through a few pages; smiles.

188 INT. INTERCONTINENTAL HOTEL LOBBY. NIGHT

VENUS, flustered, talks on Josie's mobile. In the background OLIVER at 'Reception' with his and Venus' bags, checks in.

VENUS
Mum, I'm coming now. 

OLIVER, in the foreground now, hands his AMEX card to the Concierge. CLOSE ON card, made out to QUENTIN MEADES. In the background, VENUS speaks on the phone.

VENUS
Be there soon. Love you.

CONCIERGE
We do hope that you enjoy your stay with us, Mr. Meades.

189 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS looks at the letter from the bank. PHYLLIS and MARY stand closeby.

VENUS
No extension! Three days!  Mum, do you think God might like a little break from providing?

190 INT. HOTEL ROOM. NIGHT

OLIVER, in headphones, listening in to muffled campfire conversation, sets up his computer.

DELORES (voice over)
...but having grown up in a small town in Louisiana...

191 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

JOSIE (wearing her bum-bag, as always), NOTCH and DELORES sit around the fire. 

DELORES
...Samantha has no life experiences to write about so she gives up her job at Wal Mart and heads for LA to live out her life long dream of being a writer for the movies…

192 INT. TOUR VEHICLE. NIGHT

LARRY and RANDY sit in the Tour Vehicle, looking at a computer screen on which a man behind a big desk (Studio Head) addresses them, though we do not hear what he says.

DELORES (voice over)
…and there she meets an impotent, I mean important, Hollywood producer called Barry who hates to be seen …

LARRY and RANDY listen intently to the man speaking onscreen, nodding a lot.

DELORES (voice over)
...in public without a beautiful woman at his side…

LARRY'S and RANDY faces break into a happy smiles. They give each other high fives. RANDY stands, moves to the door.

193 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS and MARY look at the screen of Venus' computer:

The Prime Minister (identified by caption) standing in front of microphones and cameras.

PRIME MINISTER (onscreen)
My fellow Australians, it is an honour…

194 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

JOSIE is a little put out by NOTCH'S apparent interest in DELORES as she tells her story.

DELORES
…and he takes Samantha to Australia in search of a movie project that will be bigger than 'Crocodile Dundee' and while she is there she stumbles upon a great real life story…

RANDY and LARRY walk up, excited.  RANDY to JOSIE:

RANDY
The studio agrees. That you would be perfect play the lead.

JOSIE looks LARRY to RANDY - shocked, confused.

195 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS and MARY look at the computer screen. We do not see what they see.

MARY
Never, in my wildest dreams, would I ever have imagined our Prime Minister doing that…How did the Pentagon…!?

196 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

RANDY
The studio thinks you're sensational. Star material. They are raving about the test scenes.

JOSIE  (perplexed)
Test scenes! What test scenes?

197 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS and MARY peer with fascination at the computer screen - both shocked by what they are seeing.

MARY
If this became public knowledge it would destroy him.

198 INT. TOUR VEHICLE. NIGHT

JOSIE and NOTCH look at footage of Josie on Larry's computer:

LARRY  (voice off)
She's not pink…down here as well, is she, son?

JOSIE, onscreen, turns and looks directly down the barrel of Larry's camera.

JOSIE (onscreen)
Yes she is, Larry. “My pink pussy.” That's what Randy says when he talks dirty.

JOSIE, mortified, watches NOTCH looking at the screen.

199 INT. HOTEL ROOM. NIGHT

OLIVER, his recording device closeby, listens in:

JOSIE’S VOICE
Pink is his favourite colour. He loves all my pink bits, don't you, Randy?

200 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS and MARY look at Venus' computer screen.

VENUS (to Mary)
We need a complete list of all Australian media outlets.

As PHYLLIS enters the room with 3 steaming cups of tea and biscuits on a tray, her eyes are drawn to the computer screen.

VENUS
Mum, you shouldn't look at this.

PHYLLIS watches for a moment.

PHYLLIS
Darling, I've seen enough Discovery Channel documentaries not to be surprised by anything that primates get up to…

201 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

JOSIE and NOTCH sit alone by the fire. LARRY, RANDY and DELORES prepare for bed in the background.

NOTCH
Well, if the script sucks and you don't want to be an actress anyway, the answer's simple.

JOSIE
But...but...I'll earn more money doing ‘Thunder’ than I'd earn in 3 years designing clothes. And it’s only 6 weeks!?

She looks to NOTCH for advice He shrugs. JOSIE bites her lip.

202 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS speaks on the phone. MARY watches the flickering computer screen with fascination.

VENUS
No, I want to speak with the head of the network. Tell him I have the Pentagon's Prime Minister's sleaze file. He'll want to talk to me.

203 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

JOSIE looks to NOTCH in hopes of advice.

JOSIE
What would you do?

NOTCH
Like everything in life, mate, if it's what you want to do, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone, just do it.

JOSIE
The only person that's likely to get hurt is me?

NOTCH (smiles)  
Yeah, and who might 'me' be?

JOSIE (laughs)
Take your pick! Josie, Venus or Serena. Which one's your favourite?
From his POV in the background, RANDY sees JOSIE laughing and looking at NOTCH.

NOTCH
My favourite!? I reckon its the girl who's got a bee in her bonnet about learning to make funny clothes with that Amaroo bloke and who's wondering if the bloke she's talking to by the fire is going to…

NOTCH looks directly into JOSIE'S eyes.

JOSIE
Going to what?

NOTCH leans forward and kisses JOSIE lightly on the lips. JOSIE catches her breath. RANDY looks on in the background.

JOSIE
You shouldn't have done that?

NOTCH
Want me to take it back?

JOSIE nods. NOTCH kisses JOSIE again.

204 INT. TV NETWORK. NIGHT

A NEWSPAPER EDITOR, behind a desk in a large newspaper office looks at his computer. We do not see what he is looking at. He speaks on the phone.

NETWORK HEAD
He's a dark horse, our Prime Minister, isn't he!

205 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE. NIGHT

VENUS, phone in hand, listens.

NETWORK HEAD (telephone)
This is SENSATIONAL. We'd have exclusive rights, right?

VENUS
Of course.

206 INT. HOTEL ROOM. NIGHT

OLIVER in his hotel room looks at the screen of his computer. 

OLIVER'S BOSS 
You understand what's at stake here! Nothing less than the US Australian alliance.

OLIVER
Yes sir.

207 EXT. CAMPSITE. NIGHT

JOSIE and NOTCH sit beside the fire.

NOTCH
You are the most beautiful woman I have met in my entire life.

JOSIE
Bet you say that to all your backpackers!

NOTCH
Nuh! You're the first.

RANDY calls out in the background (for his father's benefit).

RANDY
Serena! You coming to bed, honey?

JOSIE
Coming. (TO NOTCH) I'm not doing this because I want to…

NOTCH
But because you're getting paid to.

JOSIE
A promise is a promise…But I'm not, you know (sleeping with him)…?

NOTCH
Just that one kiss, right!?

JOSIE
Only because I desperately needed the money so I could study with Amaroo.

NOTCH
Which you probably won't do now because you can make more money doing something you don't want to do and becoming a fillum star!

JOSIE bites her lip.

208 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

Typing fast, VENUS explores PENTAGON files. MARY looks on.

VENUS
If I can just find who's been hacking into my computer…

She locates the file she is looking for: QUENTIN MEADES.

VENUS
Quentin Meades!

After a little more exploration of the QUENTIN MEADES file: 

VENUS
Holy shit! Quentin's checked into the same hotel as me and Oliver; using his AMEX card.

VENUS is concerned by the possible implications.

MARY
So you could just buy something over the phone, give Quentin's AMEX card number and…

This gives VENUS an idea.

VENUS (smiles)
You're learning fast, sis!

209 INT. TENT. NIGHT

RANDY, in his sleeping bag, looks at JOSIE, in her own sleeping bag, speaking in a loud whisper.

JOSIE
I just don't want to be in your film.

RANDY
Did Notch put you up to this? 

JOSIE bites her lip.

210 INT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE.  NIGHT

VENUS is talking on the telephone.

VENUS
Yes, I'd like to order 6 dozen red roses in the name of Quentin Meades, AMEX number…

211 INT. TENT. NIGHT.

RANDY
But 'Thunder Downunder' has been greenlit because you are in the lead!

JOSIE feels a little guilty, which is RANDY'S intention!

212 EXT. SWIMMING HOLE. (1) DAY

JOSIE and NOTCH, on a ledge overhanging a tranquil pool, look down to RANDY, standing by the pool, mobile phone in hand.

NOTCH
So, three months with Amaroo doing what ya wanna do or three months acting in this ‘Thunder Downunder’ fillum which ya don’t wanna do. Why’s that a difficult decision?

JOSIE
$20,000's is difficult to say 'no' to, but...(A BEAT)... don't you think!

NOTCH
Not if it means missing out doing what ya really want to do.

A thunder clap is heard. JOSIE looks up. Dark clouds cover the sky.

213 EXT. SWIMMING HOLE. (2) DAY

DELORES, in her pink thong underwear, stands at the water's edge, watching RANDY talk on his mobile. Behind DELORES, LARRY is filming.

CLOSE ON RANDY:

RANDY
Bruce Cockburn…also known as Notch… yes…criminal record…medical…sexual orientation…yes…dirt…ASAP.

CLOSE ON Larry's camera flip-out screen:

Delores' pink-thonged bottom is prominent as she dives into the water.

214 EXT. SWIMMING HOLE. (1) DAY

JOSIE'S  eyes are on NOTCH - hoping he will help her decide.

JOSIE
Help!

NOTCH smiles, leans forward to kiss JOSIE.

JOSIE
Don't you dare kiss me in front of Larry.

NOTCH
A little kiss never hurt anyone.

JOSIE
Don't be silly! Every broken heart starts with a kiss.

It begins to rain.

NOTCH
Just a bit of drizzle. Nothing to worry about.

The rain starts to come down in buckets.

215 INT HOTEL ROOM. DAY

VENUS talks on the phone. Outside it is pouring with rain.

VENUS
Yes, exclusive rights. I want the cash delivered in a brown paper bag at 2.30 tomorrow afternoon…

216 EXT. CAMPSITE.  DAY

JOSIE, NOTCH, DELORES, RANDY and LARRY clamber into the Tour Vehicle. The ground is covered by a thick layer of mud. JOSIE dries her hair (her 'Serena' wig) with a towel.

NOTCH
Folks, I'm afraid we're going to have to move to higher ground. If it's rained in the catchment area that creek could be a river in a few minutes.

The vehicle's wheels spin in the mud as the water breaks over the creek banks and begins to creep towards the tyres. More spinning of wheels before the tour vehicle moves off.

217 INT HOTEL ROOM. DAY

VENUS listens impatiently on the hands free phone. A knock on the door. VENUS walks towards it.

VENUS (on telephone)
If you don't like the deal, I'll go elsewhere, no problems. 

VENUS hangs up and opens the door to: a smiling PORTER with a trolley groaning under the weight of several dozen roses.

PORTER
Mr. Quentin Meades?

VENUS
Sorry, wrong room.

PORTER
This room is booked in the name of Mr. Quentin Meades.

VENUS looks at the roses in horror; the implications of this new development sinking in.

OLIVER (off screen)
Hot damn!

VENUS spins around to see OLIVER and CONSTABLE BERT walk in.

OLIVER
You got a secret admirer, Josie?

VENUS sees the card attached to the flowers which reads QUENTIN, I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE UP TO, ASSHOLE, VENUS.

VENUS
No, they're for you, from me.

OLIVER
Hell, Josie, that is so sweet of you. You little angel. Oh, this is Constable Bert Strang. 

CONSTABLE BERT
Pleased to meet you, Josie. Oliver's told me all about you. Oliver's right! You and Venus sure could be sisters, though you're much better looking than she is. Sorry…!
BERT has just realized that he has revealed a secret OLIVER has shared with him.

OLIVER turns red with embarrassment.

OLIVER
Bert's helping me track down that vixen, Venus!

VENUS
Has she…done something wrong? This Venus?

OLIVER
She's a very clever con artist, Josie. Up to all kinds of mischief with bad cheques, assault, identity fraud. Pretending to be you.

VENUS
And if you catch this…Venus… what will you do with her.

CONSTABLE BERT
When we catch her! 

CONSTABLE BERT'S mobile phone starts to ring.

CONSTABLE BERT
When we catch her!  We're going to take her out of the loop. Isn't that the expression, Quentin? Excuse me.

CONSTABLE BERT answers his phone. VENUS sees OLIVER/QUENTIN reach out to take the card from the flowers. She rushes forward, grabs hold of it, crumples it in her hand and throws herself into OLIVER'S arms, hugging him tight. OLIVER smiles.

OLIVER
Josie! Does this mean...?

VENUS nods. OLIVER smiles. CONSTABLE BERT hangs up.

CONSTABLE BERT
We've got a flood and guess who's stranded!?

218 EXT. HILLOCK.  DAY

The Tour Vehicle is parked on top of a small hillock surrounded by water with trees poking out of it.

219 EXT. PIER. DAY

VENUS and OLIVER climb aboard a Police Launch with CONSTABLE BERT. OLIVER carries his recording device.

VENUS
You're a spy!

OLIVER
I'm sorry I've been economical with the truth, Josie, but the alliance between the US and Australia is at stake and…

OLIVER takes out a gun, checks to see it's loaded, tucks it into his concealed shoulder holster. VENUS looks worried.

220 EXT. POLICE LAUNCH. FLOODWATERS. DAY 

VENUS, anxious, stands at the bow as CONSTABLE BERT negotiates the muddy floodwaters. Through speakers Josie’s muffled voice can be heard:

JOSIE’S VOICE
We're not going to drown, are we?

VENUS picks up a pair of binoculars.

221 EXT. TOUR VEHICLE. DAY

NOTCH and JOSIE, stand on the roof of the tour vehicle. Notch watches the Police Launch approach through binoculars.

NOTCH 
No, mate, the crocs'll get us before we have a chance to drown.

NOTCH recognizes CONSTABLE BERT.

NOTCH
Shit! It's Bert! The cop with an arrest warrant for Josie Higgenbottom.

JOSIE
Flipping hell! Show me.

NOTCH holds the binoculars out to JOSIE. DELORES, RANDY and LARRY clamber up onto the roof of the Tour Vehicle also.

222 EXT. POLICE LAUNCH. DAY

Through her own binoculars, VENUS sees JOSIE take binoculars from NOTCH. She whispers to herself.

VENUS
Josie! What the...!

223 EXT. TOUR VEHICLE. DAY

JOSIE, looking through binoculars, recognizes CONSTABLE BERT.

JOSIE (exclaims)
If he finds out that I'm Josie… I'm in deep…!

JOSIE sees VENUS now:

JOSIE
Holy frigging moley! It's Venus! 

224 EXT. POLICE LAUNCH. DAY

Through binoculars, OLIVER/QUENTIN looks at JOSIE.

OLIVER
Venus! At last!

OLIVER/QUENTIN turns to VENUS with a triumphant smile. Triumphant is not what VENUS is feeling right now!

225 EXT. TOUR VEHICLE. DAY

JOSIE focuses the binoculars on OLIVER/QUENTIN.

JOSIE
And Oliver, the guy who rescued me from the cop! What's he doing here?

NOTCH
That's Quentin - the FBI guy that wants to kill Venus.

JOSIE
He told me his name was Oliver!

NOTCH
Well, the truth about Oliver… Quentin is…

JOSIE
So, I've got a choice between being arrested as Josie or killed as Venus!?

NOTCH
I'd stick with Serena, if I were you.

JOSIE
But the cop knows that I've got to be either Venus or Josie! 

NOTCH
In the grand scheme of things, mate, its not that important who you are. It's how you feel about who you are that's important.

JOSIE
How I feel! I'm about to be arrested or killed and that's the best you can come up with!?

NOTCH grins at her. The Police launch is now just 20 or so meters away from the tour vehicle.

226 EXT. POLICE LAUNCH. DAY

OLIVER/QUENTIN smiles triumphantly at having caught 'Venus'. His excitement is short-lived, however, as he recognizes NOTCH, standing beside JOSIE. NOTCH calls out to him.

NOTCH
Quentin, mate, fancy running into you out here?

OLIVER
I don't mind admitting to my true identity, Mr. Notch, now that I've found who I'm looking for…Venus.

OLIVER points at JOSIE - dressed as Serena. RANDY and LARRY look to JOSIE for an explanation but JOSIE is lost for words. OLIVER revels in his victory.

OLIVER
Venus Aphrodite! Con artist! Liar, thief, blackmailer, enemy to all that is decent and a clear and present danger to the alliance between Australia and the United States of America.

VENUS, standing alongside OLIVER/QUENTIN is less than pleased to hear all this!

NOTCH
Hold up there a sec Quentin, old son,! Before you start making wild allegations about this young woman here I reckon you oughta think about the ramifications of a certain photograph of a certain FBI Agent being posted on the internet and his true identity, amongst other things, being revealed.

A look of horror crosses OLIVER'S face.

CONSTABLE BERT

Now look here, Notch. I've got a warrant for Venus here (HE POINTS AT JOSIE) for causing grievous bodily harm to Reg and Madge at the Desert Palms while pretending to be Josie here.

CONSTABLE BERT indicates VENUS standing alongside him.

NOTCH
I think you might find you're mistaken there Bert - as I'm sure you'd discover if you asked a few questions of a certain policeman who is actively involved in the recycling of illegal substances in and around Darwin.

All eyes focus on CONSTABLE BERT.

LARRY (perplexed)
Will someone please explain what is going on here!?

227 EXT. POLICE LAUNCH. DAY

They are all aboard the Police Launch now. CONSTABLE BERT, deflated, steers the launch between trees whose branches sweep over the passengers; forcing them to duck at times.

OLIVER, also unhappy with this outcome, stands beside CONSTABLE BERT - glaring at JOSIE at the other end of the boat, huddled together with VENUS and
RANDY.

NOTCH, stands by himself, observes his fellow boat passengers with wry amusement.

JOSIE'S eyes are on OLIVER/QUENTIN. She speaks in a loud whisper.

JOSIE (to Randy)
Oliver…or Quentin…or whatever the his name is, thinks I'm Venus and he wants to kill Venus. If I just admit that I'm Josie…

RANDY (to Josie)
But if dad finds out that you're not Serena and that I've been bullshitting him he'll kill me.

VENUS
And if Oliver…Quentin finds out that I'm really Venus he'll have to kill me! (TO JOSIE) If you could just be me for a bit longer? You help me and I'll help you. Trust me.

JOSIE
Trust you! TRUST! YOU!

NOTCH walks up, takes JOSIE'S arm, RANDY answers his mobile.

NOTCH
Want you to meet a couple of mates of mine.

He nods in the direction of OLIVER and CONSTABLE BERT. 

JOSIE
But…

Looks of horror cross both JOSIE'S and VENUS' faces. DELORES observes with interest. RANDY listens on his phone - nodding and then smiling. Looks of horror also cross the faces of OLIVER and CONSTABLE BERT as NOTCH walks up.

NOTCH
Quentin Meades, Constable Bert Strang, I'd like to introduce you to a close friend of mine.

JOSIE smiles as best she can but fails to duck fast enough as a branch sweeps over the deck, catches her brunette 'Serena' wig, and carries it off - revealing her short pink hair. NOTCH continues on as if nothing has happened; CONSTABLE BERT and OLIVER also pretend that nothing has happened.

NOTCH
Serena Monticelliano.

OLIVER
It's a pleasure, mam.

CONSTABLE BERT
Pleased to meet you, Serena.

DELORES walks up to join BERT, OLIVER, NOTCH and JOSIE and LARRY - whose mouth hangs open as he looks from pink-haired VENUS to pink-haired JOSIE - distinguishable from each other now only through their different clothes. 

CONSTABLE BERT leans close to NOTCH. RANDY, smiling, ends his phone call.

CONSTABLE BERT (sotto voce)
This is blackmail.

DELORES
I think, Constable, in a strictly legal sense, its only blackmail if Notch tries to make money by threatening to reveal that you're a drug dealer.

CONSTABLE BERT  turns bright red. Randy walks up.

RANDY
Hey, Notch, We've been wondering how you came to be called Notch?

NOTCH (embarrassed)
Just something silly the guys at the pub…

RANDY
Not from what I hear around the traps. The truth is, ladies…

NOTCH (uneasy)
I don't think they want to know, Randy!

JOSIE and DELORES reply in unison.
            JOSIE                                                   DELORES
      We do.                                                      We do.

RANDY
Well, you see, on every outback tour there's always at least one horny young lady backpacker who's looking for a bit of excitement and who falls for his line.

JOSIE is not sure she wants to hear this.

DELORES
Which is?

RANDY
“You are the most beautiful woman I have met in my entire life.”

NOTCH is speechless. JOSIE, devastated, edges away from him.

JOSIE
And he keeps an album full of photos of his conquests?

RANDY
Yeah, each of them another notch in his belt. Get it? Notch!

228 EXT. JETTY. DAY

JOSIE, tears welling in her eyes, bites her lip, looks at NOTCH for a moment then gets into a large 4-wheel drive with RANDY, LARRY and DELORES. She turns back to face NOTCH.

JOSIE
Just another notch in your belt..!?

NOTCH shakes his head; looks away. JOSIE looks at him pleadingly; wanting him to say what she wants to hear. 

229 INT. CAR. DAY

Tears stream down JOSIE'S face. She pulls the window shut. NOTCH disappears from frame.

230 EXT. JETTY. DAY

As Josie drives off, VENUS and DELORES confront NOTCH.

VENUS
Yes, she wants to hear that you think she's the most beautiful woman in the world but…

DELORES
…she doesn't want to hear that you've used that line before.

NOTCH
But she is the most beautiful girl I've ever me…I'm in love with her…

VENUS
Have you told her?

NOTCH
She knows I do.

DELORES
There's a few things about women you don't understand, Bruce.

NOTCH
There's nothing about women I DO understand.

VENUS
Women like to hear a guy say the words.

NOTCH looks directly into VENUS' eyes.

NOTCH
'I love you'.

VENUS is a little thrown by this.

DELORES
What you've got to do is tell her something you've never told any other woman.
NOTCH is still looking directly into Venus' eyes.

NOTCH
Have you ever loved someone so much that you can't even imagine your life without them in it?

VENUS' jaw quivers; tears well in her eyes.

VENUS
No.

NOTCH
That's what I'd say to Josie.

VENUS
Oh…

VENUS wipes moisture from her eyes. NOTCH hands her a handkerchief. VENUS shakes her head, pulls herself together, turns and starts to walk off, leaving NOTCH mystified.

DELORES
And don't be afraid of romantic gestures. Women love that stuff. Think Richard Gere!

VENUS stops. A smile appears on her face. She has an idea.

RANDY and LARRY watch as VENUS strides back to join NOTCH and DELORES and speaks animatedly to them. NOTCH shakes his head (“No way!”) but DELORES points her finger at him and nods emphatically: “We're not giving you a choice!”)
VENUS rejoins OLIVER - who notices her moist eyes.

OLIVER
Are you OK?

VENUS
Ollie…Quentin…if I told you that I'd…well, been less than honest with you…lied to you… would you…I'm not who you think I am. I'm Venus - the woman you've been chasing.

OLIVER
I know.

VENUS
You know! Since when?

OLIVER
Since I saw the card on the flowers:  “Quentin, I know what you're up to, asshole”…signed Venus…”

VENUS
…I wanted to tell you before but when I heard you were going to kill Venus…take her out of the loop…

OLIVER
Not kill. Take her out of this little Aussie loop and introduce her into The Big Loop. Washington.

VENUS looks at him, puzzled.

OLIVER
The Pentagon's  always on the lookout for accomplished liars and computer hackers so there's a job waiting for you in Washington…

231 EXT. NOTCH'S HOUSE. DAY

NOTCH is sitting outside his ramshackle house, whittling a piece of wood as he watches a car drive up and DELORES get out of it - a floppy parcel in her hands. She walks up to NOTCH, hands it to him.

DELORES
Venus says if you chicken out she'll… well, it'd be painful and reduce your chances of ever being a dad to zero!

NOTCH bends the parcel, shakes his head, sighs.

DELORES
This is just a secret between us, right!  I was never here!

NOTCH nods. DELORES gets into her car and drives off.

232 INT. RESTAURANT. NIGHT

In a hotel restaurant JOSIE, stunning in a multi-colored patchwork bustier with tiny mirrors sewn into it, with matching flared skirt, is confronted by an angry AMAROO.

AMAROO 
You'd rather be in a B-grade movie than follow your passion!?

RANDY, LARRY and DELORES sit at a table in the background. 

JOSIE
No, but…

Band members assemble with their instruments onstage.

AMAROO
You're just going to waste your talent?

JOSIE feels awful. The sound of a champagne cork popping.

LARRY
Hey, Serena, honey, come here.

JOSIE smiles sheepishly at AMAROO and turns back to LARRY; accepting a glass of champagne extended to her by RANDY.

LARRY
Sign your life away, sweetheart. Just here and here.

LARRY puts a contract in front of JOSIE for “Thunder Downunder”. JOSIE looks at AMAROO. He shakes his head. JOSIE bites her lip, takes a big gulp of champagne and signs the contract. As LARRY countersigns the contract JOSIE watches AMAROO walk off in a huff.

BRANDON, dressed as a cowboy, guitar in hand, walks out onstage. He sees JOSIE, smiles and tips his hat to her.

BRANDON
I'd like to dedicate the first song from our new CD to the beautiful young woman who inspired it. It's called 'Maple Syrup'.

JOSIE, distraught, can only manage the beginnings of a smile. As BRANDON begins to sing, NOTCH'S head (only) appears above the crowd of people at the entrance waiting to be seated.

JOSIE, LARRY, RANDY and DELORES watch BRANDON  perform. RANDY notices something and turns to stare behind him. LARRY, JOSIE  and DELORES follow suit.

DELORES face breaks into a smile and she (and the others) see:

NOTCH, in a white military uniform (like Richard Gere in AN OFFICER AND A GENTLEMAN) striding towards JOSIE. NOTCH stops at their table, unsure what to do next. After a moment's hesitation:

NOTCH
It's true, Josie, I have used that line before but that was before I met you, but…look I'll understand if you decide ya can never trust me again but…more than anything I want you to do what you really want to do and not do what you don't want to do for the wrong reasons…

JOSIE stares at NOTCH - dumbfounded. DELORES smiles to herself.

NOTCH
This is so you can stay in Australia and learn sewing with that Amaroo bloke if you want.

NOTCH hands JOSIE a wad of $100 notes. AMAROO looks on.

NOTCH
And…I love you that much I can't imagine my life without you.

As if in a dream, JOSIE stands.  NOTCH takes her in his arms and kisses her on the lips.

VENUS, standing by entrance (not wanting to be seen) smiles as NOTCH and JOSIE kiss - her eyes moistening. 

LARRY
You're a bit late, Superman.

LARRY waves the contract in the air. JOSIE looks at LARRY (smiling triumphantly), then to the contract and then to RANDY, who looks a bit uncomfortable. Then back to LARRY.

JOSIE
But you wouldn't hold me to the contract if I decided I wanted to be mentored by Amaroo instead, would you Larry?

LARRY
I'm sorry, sweetheart! A contract's a contract.

JOSIE, deflated, looks from the contract lying on the table, to LARRY'S smug smiling face, then to NOTCH and then to RANDY - who shrugs, smiles guiltily.

JOSIE throws herself across the table and grabs the contract before LARRY has an opportunity to stop her.

JOSIE
Sometimes you've got to give destiny a bit of a helping hand!
As JOSIE tears the contract up, NOTCH looks on proudly. DELORES can't wipe the grin off her face. Nor can AMAROO.

233 INT FERAL TOURS. NIGHT

NOTCH driving, bursts out laughing.

NOTCH
I did not fancy Delores. 

JOSIE
You couldn't keep your eyes off her.

NOTCH
That was just to make you jealous.

JOSIE
So you were never tempted to…you know…with Delores?

NOTCH shakes his head.

JOSIE
I've had visions of Delores driving out to your place, paying you a surprise visit, stripping down to her pink thong underwear…

NOTCH laughs. JOSIE looks at him, as if expecting an answer.

NOTCH
She didn't?

JOSIE
Pay you a surprise visit?
NOTCH
No.

234 EXT/INT. NOTCH'S HOUSE. NIGHT

Notch's photo album, on a fire. The corners of the photo of Helga from Germany turn up at the edges and turn black before the whole photo bursts into flames.

JOSIE and NOTCH, their faces lit by the fire's flames, smile at each other. They kiss.

In a brief MUSIC OVER MONTAGE, NOTCH lights candles, opens a bottle of champagne. They talk, drink, laugh, start to undress each other. JOSIE holds her hands up to stop him.

JOSIE (grins)
I'll be back in a moment.

A LITTLE LATER.

NOTCH lies on the bed. JOSIE, seen from behind, walks to him - naked but for the bum-bag NOTCH gave her, around her waist.

JOSIE
You said only to take it off if I trust who I'm sharing a bed with.

NOTCH laughs out loud. JOSIE takes off the bum bag and stands naked in front of him; seen from behind her. NOTCH places his hands on her hips, looks her up and…down…
 
NOTCH
How do you…you know, get them pink like that?

JOSIE
Well first you've got to bleach them…

The camera tilts up to Basil the python staring down on the lovers.

JOSIE (voice off)
And you've got to be very careful not to spill any bleach on…you know… then…and then…and then… and…and…mmmmmm

LATER

JOSIE and NOTCH in bed. JOSIE wakes, extricates herself from NOTCH'S embrace, slips out of bed, makes her way to the 'kitchen', fills a glass of water and, as she drinks it, looks back at NOTCH lovingly - his mouth slightly open; snoring. As she turns to look out into the night, something outside catches her attention.

JOSIE moves to the outdoor shower and finds, hanging from a tap, a pair of pink thong knicker underwear. JOSIE stares at them for a long moment.

235 EXT. NOTCH'S HOUSE. NIGHT

JOSIE, tears streaming down her cheeks, rides Notch's bicycle away from his ramshackle house.

236 INT. NOTCH'S HOUSE. DAWN

NOTCH wakes up, can see no sign of Josie.

NOTCH
Josie?

Puzzled, he gets out of bed and sees, on the kitchen table, the wad of $100 bills and a note: I'LL LEAVE YOUR BICYCLE AT THE ROADHOUSE.

237 INT. FERAL TOURS. DAWN

NOTCH drives fast.

238 EXT. ROADHOUSE. DAWN

NOTCH walks from FERAL TOURS to the Roadhouse. He sees his bicycle leaning up against a wall.

239 INT. ROADHOUSE. DAY

The PROPRIETOR of the Roadhouse shakes his head at NOTCH.

PROPRIETOR
Got a bus straight through to Sydney. Couple of hours ago.

240 DARWIN CITY STREET. DAY

MARY, on her bicycle, pulls up at an intersection. A MAN waits there, a paper bag in his hand.

MAN
Michelle?

MARY
Yes. You got something for me?

He nods, hands MARY the paper bag. She looks inside, nods, hands him a VHS.

MAN
Exclusive rights, right?

MARY nods.

241 INT/EXT. VARIOUS LOCATIONS

In a MUSIC OVER MONTAGE, VENUS, with MARY'S help, meets with VARIOUS MEN in various locations to repeat the same exchange.

One of the 'couriers', waiting for VENUS has his back to her as she approaches. When he turns around VENUS sees that it is CONSTABLE BERT, in plain clothes. He and VENUS get a shock.

CONSTABLE BERT
Just helping out a mate, Michelle.

VENUS
Of course, 'Ian'.

CONSTABLE BERT hands VENUS a paper bag. She opens it. It is full of $100 bills.

242 EXT. PHYLLIS' HOUSE. SUNSET

VENUS and MARY run from the street to the front door, in which stands PHYLLIS, with the BANK MANAGER. VENUS hands a large clear plastic bag filled with wads of $100 bills to her mother and turns to the BANK MANAGER with a smile.

A LITTLE LATER

As the Bank Manger's car drives off, PHYLLIS, a beatific smile on her face and a thick wad of green $100 bills in one hand, raises her eyes to heaven.

PHYLLIS
Thank you, Lord.

VENUS kisses PHYLLIS, turns to walk off but then turns back to confront her mother.

VENUS
Mum, listen to me. This is very important. God didn't send you this money. I stole it, right! I'm a…a professional stripper and robber.

PHYLLIS
Paint stripper!? Rubber!?

243 INT. HOTEL ROOM. EVENING

VENUS walks in with her bulging shoulder bag, listening on Josie's mobile phone to Josephine Senior speaking in her plumy theatrical English accent.

JOSEPHINE SENIOR (telephone)
But darling heart, you are such a fine actress. It breaks my heart.

VENUS speaks with Josie's English accent. OLIVER, on the verandah, talks on his mobile.

VENUS
But mum, it would break my heart not to do what I want to do and what I want to do is create beautiful clothes.

JOSIE SENIOR (telephone)
Well I broke my mother's heart when I became an actress, so I suppose…

VENUS smiles.

VENUS
I love you mum.

JOSIE SENIOR (telephone)
I love you too, darling.

VENUS hangs up, looks at OLIVER - smiling and nodding as he wraps up his telephone conversation and walks into the room.

OLIVER
Will be in Washington in 48 hours.

OLIVER hangs up, smiles at VENUS

OLIVER
A job offer. A BIG job offer from the NSA

VENUS
NSA?

OLIVER
National Security Agency. I mean BIG, as in BIG money.

VENUS (smiles)
Lucky you.

OLIVER
Lucky we! I need a partner who knows her way around computers.

VENUS smiles. Hers and OLIVER'S hands meet in a 'high five'.

244 INT. PLANE. SUNSET

VENUS and OLIVER run on board the plane. They are the last passengers. The doors are closed behind them.

LATER.

With the setting sun streaming through the window, VENUS and OLIVER clink their glasses of champagne together.

HOSTESS (over intercom)
The flight time to Sydney will be…

VENUS
Shit, I just thought of something. There's a problem with my passport.

OLIVER
What kind of problem?

VENUS
There's a few warrants out for…Rhonda. Non-payment of fines…

OLIVER
Who's Rhonda?

VENUS
Me.

245 EXT. NOTCH'S HOUSE. SUNSET

NOTCH, miserable, washes himself under his outdoor shower. He stares straight at the pink thong knicker underwear hanging from the tap but it takes some time before the penny drops.

NOTCH
Shit!

246 INT. BUS. NIGHT

JOSIE, miserable, cheeks tear-streaked, sits on a bus. She unfolds the newspaper in her lap, sees, on the front page:

A photo of Terence (from FETISHES) and a headline CRIME BOSS DENIES 'EXPOSING' 'BIG TONY'!

Close on the newspaper byline:

Terence Lansky Denies Responsibility for Digitally Doctored Footage of controversial Politician.

247 INT. 'FERAL TOURS' OUTBACK ROAD. NIGHT

NOTCH, a determined look on his face, drives fast.

248 INT. BRITISH CONSULATE. DAY

VENUS stands at a counter, OLIVER closeby. A CONSULAR CLERK opens a folder, flicks through documents until he comes upon one that has a colour photo of Josie - with pink hair. He looks up at VENUS who, with her pink hair, looks close to identical to Josie's photo. The CONSULAR CLERK smiles.

CONSULAR CLERK
We'll have your new passport ready for you in two hours, Miss Higgenbottom.

…to be continued…

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