Thursday, June 20, 2013
# 2 BILL CLINTON'S LOVE CHILD
…following on from BILL CLINTON’S LOVE CHILD # 1
37 EXT. OUTBACK AUSTRALIA. LATE AFTERNOON
Through a wide angle lens, a red dusty road unfolds in the dry desert landscape. The middle of nowhere indeed.
This has been the POV of a Prentie (lizard) peering out through the wire mesh of a makeshift wire cage strapped to a platform welded to a bicycle frame in front of the handle bars.
The bare-chested 28 year old man on the bicycle, NOTCH, his long hair tied in a bun on top of his head, has ‘bush eccentric’ written all over him. He hums ‘Waltzing Matilda’ to himself as he rides – clearly in no hurry to get anywhere.
Hanging alongside the rear wheel of Notch’s bicycle are two large leather panniers.
NOTCH’S humming is gradually drowned out by the sound of a truck driving towards him – with THUNDER DOWNUNDER written in large letters across the front of it. It is bearing down on him fast.
38 INT. TRUCK. LATE AFTERNOON
NOTCH on his bicycle, his hand raised in greeting, can be seen as the truck roars past him.
39 EXT. OUTBACK AUSTRALIA. LATE AFTERNOON
NOTCH rides his bicycle out of the cloud of dust – covered in a layer of it but still humming Waltzing Matilda as though nothing untoward had happened.
NOTCH becomes aware of Venus’ car behind him and of the impatient beeping of the horn. He raises the index finger of his right hand. Venus car pulls alongside and NOTCH becomes aware of JOSIE, camera at the ready, preparing to take a photo of him. He turns to her, smiles and raises his index finger directly in front to the lens. Venus’ car speeds off into the distance.
As he rides on down the road NOTCH’S attention is caught by a yellow object at the side of the road. He stops, leans over and picks it up. It is Josie’s yellow cardboard box camera. He picks it up, slips it into one of the many pockets in his baggy khaki shorts and continues on his way, humming ‘Waltzing Matilda’ to himself.
NOTCH pulls up alongside where Josie’s suitcase hit the ground – strewn with an assortment of very colourful and imaginatively designed clothes.
He registers the small figure of JOSIE in the distance, sitting at the side of the road, her back to him.
40 EXT. ROAD. DAY
JOSIE, wearing Venus’ ‘Lolita’ sunglasses punches numbers into the pink mobile, holds it to her ear, speaks in a broad Australian accent - sounding just like Venus.
Sorry, Terence. Bad reception. Yeah, I’ve got the ‘Big Tony’ tape and…five grand ay?
How soon can you…
The line goes dead.
NOTCH (VOICE OFF)
CLOSE ON JOSIE as she leaps to her feet in shock, spins around to see:
NOTCH, covered in dust, wearing on the otherwise naked upper half of his body a multi-coloured bustier encrusted with beads and tiny mirrors that sparkle in the afternoon sun.
FREEZE FRAME on NOTCH, grinning playfully as:
JOSIE begins to exclaim ‘Fuck’ but gets only as far as ‘F’.
41 EXT. OUTBACK ROAD. DAY
As OLIVER changes a flat tyre on his car he hears the second half of JOSIE’S ‘Fuck!” exclamation
JOSIE (VOICE OFF)
42 EXT. OUTBACK ROAD.
JOSIE is in shock as she takes in the vision before her. With his hair tied in a knot on the top of his head, his unshaven face covered in dust and wearing a bustier much too small for him, NOTCH is the epitome of ‘bush eccentric’.
It's not a good day. It's a frigging dreadful day.
NOTCH'S eyes lower. He gets only the briefest of glimpses of the slender pink mobile phone before JOSIE slips it quickly back into her bag.
That what I think it is?
What do you think I think it is?
JOSIE has turned bright red. Indicating the bustier on NOTCH.
That's my bustier.
Yeah, thought as much. Reckon it'd look better on you than me.
So…where ya headed?
You offering me a ride!?
Depends where ya going, mate.
Please don't call me mate! (A BEAT) Don't know where I'm going.
Well, if ya don't know where ya going', mate, there's a good chance you're already there.
You a philosopher or something, mate?
Blind man in a dark room looking for a black hat that isn't there, ay? (A BEAT) Wanna ride…mate?
JOSIE looks at the cluttered bicycle, wondering where on earth she could possibly sit.
You've got to be kidding!
43 EXT. OUTBACK ROAD. CLOSE TO SUNSET.
JOSIE, clutches the cage with the Prentie in it, balances precariously on the platform where it was resting earlier, facing NOTCH, her legs dangling. Venus' bag is slung around her neck. Josie's red suitcase is strapped on NOTCH’S back. JOSIE is terrified of the Prentie - staring at her.
You got a name, mate?
No, mate, m'mum forgot to give me one!
That was careless of her!
Course I've got a bloody name! Josie Higgenbottom.
NOTCH bursts out laughing.
What's so funny?
Do you have to keep calling me 'mate'?
Don't have to, mate, no.
JOSIE grimaces. Her thighs are aching.
Oooh, my thighs!
NOTCH indicates her dangling legs; his lap.
You can rest 'em here if you like.
No way, mate!
No worries, mate?
JOSIE has her legs resting on NOTCH'S thighs as he cycles.
You got a name, mate?
Mendelssohn's Wedding March emanates from the black carry bag.
Notch is not a name. It's something cowboys have on their belt.
Ya phone's ringing.
It's not my phone.
Whatever you say, mate.
Mendelssohn's Wedding March stops.
So, all them fancy clothes of yours…
I'm a fashion designer.
Would you be offended if I told you you had weird taste in clothes.
You've got weird taste in clothes, mate.
You looked at your self in the mirror lately.
Was just about to ask you the same thing, mate.
He gestures to the sticky wet patches on JOSIE'S t-shirt. She becomes self-conscious, folds her arms protectively to cover her breasts. NOTCH leans forward a little, sniffs.
Smells like maple syrup.
Don’t be ridiculous.
Mendelssohn's Wedding March starts again.
It's not for me.
Maybe it's for me.
Yeah, mate, it's bound to be for you!
NOTCH takes one hand off the handle bars, reaches into Venus' black bag with his free hand, pulls out the slender pink phone; looks at it with raised eyebrows.
Get lonely at night, do you Josephine?
NOTCH presses the appropriate key and speaks in a 'plummy' English accent.
Josie Higgenbottom's residence. Miss Higgenbottom's chauffeur speaking.
NOTCH listens, nods, listens some more, nods.
Hang on a sec whilst I consult with her Ladyship.
NOTCH rests the mobile face-down on JOSIE'S thigh; covering the mouthpiece.
Some bloke by the name of Terence says he's got five grand in crisp new $100 bills for some shiela called Venus.
JOSIE grabs the mobile from NOTCH, puts it to her ear.
The line goes dead.
Though you said it wasn't your phone!
He did say $5,000?
Yeah, for Venus; not Josephine!?
If you must know Mr. Notch, I was born Venus but I hated the name so much I changed it to Josie and then my mother married my step-dad - Bruce Higgenbottom...and...and... and Terence is my uncle.
The bloke who's lined up a snake for you?
Snake. Said he's lined it up.
It's a kind of thank-you present… because… because he knows how much I love snakes.
A bit of a herpetologist are you, Venus?
JOSIE hasn't a clue what a herpetologist is.
44 EXT. NOTCH’S HOUSE. CLOSE TO SUNSET
NOTCH, with JOSIE balanced in front of him, her legs resting on his thighs, rides into the cluttered yard of his open-plan ramshackle dwelling.
Notch's house is made from second hand timber and corrugated iron; the furniture from bizarre twisted tree trunks. There are no walls. Geological and indigenous flora specimens speak of Notch's love for the bush.
NOTCH, carrying his panniers and JOSIE, with her red suitcase, walk under a tree which has a bush shower hanging from a branch.
If ya need a shower, Venus.
NOTCH indicates the bush shower - a bladder filled with water above the nozzle.
Should be plenty of warm water if ya need to...you know...
NOTCH indicates the wet sticky patches over each of JOSIE’S breasts. JOSIE turns bright red again. NOTCH grins, leans close to JOSIE, sniffs.
OK, It is maple syrup! I was... having some pancakes and, you know...spilt...
NOTCH laughs. JOSIE is mortified. Closeby there is an old Army Troop Carrier that has been partially restored. Along the side is stenciled FERAL TOURS.
45 INT. NOTCH’S HOUSE. CLOSE TO SUNSET
As JOSIE and NOTCH walk 'into' the house, they pass glass cases with snakes and lizards in them.
Make a bit of a living selling geological and zoological specimens to museums, universities and so on.
JOSIE manages to keep her fear and distaste of snakes and other reptiles secret from NOTCH.
46 EXT. NOTCH’S HOUSE. SUNSET
JOSIE, a towel wrapped around her, hangs a sarong from the tree in an attempt to provide her with some privacy as she showers. She calls out to NOTCH, twenty of so feet away ‘inside’ his house, unpacking his panniers.
JOSIE turns on the shower, drops her towel.
You got some bits and pieces ya reckon I haven't seen before, Venus?
JOSIE looks down, smiles. The phone inside Venus' shoulder bag begins to ring.
Don't answer it!
NOTCH takes the pink mobile from Venus bag, answers it.
Hello. Josephine Higgen...
JOSIE flails her arms in a frantic attempt to stop him, dislodging the sarong, leaving her nakedness exposed to NOTCH, who averts his eyes as he listens on the phone.
JOSIE clutches the sarong to her, runs 'inside'.
Hang on a sec, Terence. I'll put Venus on.
JOSIE takes the phone, clutching the sarong to her modestly. JOSIE speaks with an Australian accent.
G'day Terence. Last bit I got was about five grand in crisp new notes?
NOTCH and JOSIE’S eyes meet. NOTCH smiles, shakes his head. JOSIE blushes, turns away, her bare back and bottom facing NOTCH.
You got it, sweetheart! How soon can you get to Sydney?
Sydney! That's...more than 3,000 kilometers!
NOTCH takes the yellow disposable camera from his pocket.
CLOSE ON: JOSIE’S face.
A few days? Friday?
JOSIE bites her lip, unsure what decision to make. In the background NOTCH can be seen lifting the camera to his eye.
A ‘thought bubble’ appears alongside JOSIE’S head. In it is VENUS - speaking to her:
If you want something bad enough you do whatever it takes, babe. Whatever it takes.
NOTCH’S point of view as he takes a photo (‘Click’) of:
Josie's naked back and bottom. FREEZE FRAME. Over JOSIE’S naked back:
47 MONTAGE. NUMEROUS LOCATIONS.
Planet Earth seen from outer space - crash-zooming in on the Northern Territory of Australia. The voice over is read by a man in deep ‘voice of God’ tones. In the background Donna Summer’s ‘Hot Stuff’ is heard.
On 1st.April, in the year of our Lord, 1979, at 2.13 Greenwich Mean Time, as Margaret Thatcher becomes Prime Minister of Great Britain and Donna Summer’s ‘Hot Stuff’ hits number one on the charts...
A baby girl is born. Through the window can be seen a dry desert landscape.
...Rhonda Patterson joins the human race in the same moment as, on opposite sides of the planet...
Another baby girl is born. Through the window: a snow-covered street.
...Josephine Higgenbottom leaves the warm comfort of her mother’s womb.
Josephine’s vain actress mother (Josephine Senior) surrounded by well-wishing costumed actors cradles her new baby proudly.
In 19 years, seven months, two days, 6 hours and 23 minutes, as Presidential candidate Bill Clinton fields...
Rhonda’s mother (Phyllis) stands by the Hills Hoist clothesline, babe in arms.
...questions about the sex he didn’t have with Monica Lewinsky, Josephine and Rhonda are destined to meet, though they have no idea of this just now.
Rhonda, 6 months, is baptized in a church.
In fact neither Josephine nor Rhonda have any ideas in their heads just now, though…
Baby Rhonda’s POV: Phyllis raises her eyes to the large portrait of a blonde Jesus Christ hanging on the wall.
… this state of affairs does not last long for baby Rhonda.
Praise the Lord.
Phyllis’ unwavering belief that God has a plan for Rhonda...
Hanging next to the portrait of Jesus is a painting of Adam and Eve and the Serpent tempting Eve with an apple.
... is destined to be sorely tested!
Baby Rhonda stares wide-eyed at the Serpent.
Graphic: VENUS'S STORY…in a nutshell
PHYLLIS, baby RHONDA on her hip, hangs washing on the Hills Hoist in the yard of the ramshackle old fibro house she still lives in surrounded. There is a caravan parked in the yard.
Shortly after Rhonda was born, her mother, Phyllis, lost her husband, Dick, and found God.
RHONDA, aged 3, looks up at PHYLLIS; waiting for an answer to a question she has just asked.
The Good Lord took your father away.
RHONDA looks towards the caravan.
CLOSE ON RHONDA as she visualizes:
Her father, DICK, smiling at her as God's huge hand appears from the sky, picks him up and lifts him out of frame.
This was not strictly speaking true because Dick returns a few months later…
God's huge hand deposits DICK alongside RHONDA.
DICK tries to scare RHONDA with a small rubber snake but fails - her face lighting up with a happy smile as PHYLLIS appears in the background, a beatific smile on her face.
Praise the Lord.
…and stays long enough to take out a mortgage on the house...
RHONDA looks through the window of the rocking caravan.
…and obey the Lord's instruction to 'Go Forth and Multiply', resulting…
DICK, lying on top of PHYLLIS, looks lovingly into her eyes.
RHONDA, rubber snake in hand, stands beside PHYLLIS, 9 months pregnant, watching DICK drive off, towing the caravan.
…in Phyllis adding to the already rich store of ideas she has put into Rhonda's head…
Your father is a snake in the grass.
RHONDA looks at her rubber snake: its head transforms into her father's head smiling and winking at her.
…and in a new addition to the human race.
Phyllis gives birth to a baby girl.
Rhonda prayed for a brother but God, in his infinite wisdom, gave her a sister… Mary Magdalene Patterson.
RHONDA looks questioningly up at PHYLLIS (BABY MARY on her hip) as
PHYLLIS picks up one of several pill bottles from a kitchen shelf, tosses a couple of pills into her mouth.
It doesn’t take long before Rhonda is introduced to the magical power of…
Mother's Little Helpers.
RHONDA watches PHYLLIS (smiling beatifically) as she washes dishes.
The process of putting ideas into Rhonda's head continues for some years before Rhonda starts to have some ideas of her own.
RHONDA (8 years old), MARY (4 years old) and PHYLLIS look into the empty refrigerator
The Lord will provide.
Alas, the Lord does not provide, so Rhonda takes matters into her own hands.
RHONDA, in a supermarket, stuffs cheese, milk and bread into her school satchel. Smiling innocently, RHONDA walks nonchalantly past the Security Guard at the entrance.
RHONDA looks up to PHYLLIS who is inspecting the contents of the now full refrigerator.
You see, the Lord works in mysterious ways. He has a plan.
And so, at the age of eight, Rhonda sets about fulfilling God's plan…
PHYLLIS and MARY kneel; praying. RHONDA (8 still) sits nearby taking notes.
…a new school uniform for Mary, an egg-beater, fish for Friday…
RHONDA (still 8) steals a school uniform, an egg-beater and (most difficult of all!) a fish.
As PHYLLIS cooks the fish in the kitchen, RHONDA picks up a bottle of 'Mother's Little Helpers' and starts to unscrew the lid. PHYLLIS takes the pills from her.
God doesn't want little girls to eat these.
RHONDA reads an illustrated story of the Garden of Eden.
The similarity between this prohibition of God's and another does not escape Rhonda's attention.
GOD, dressed in white, issues a stern warning to naked Adam and Eve as Eve looks longingly at an apple in a tree.
Thou shalt not eat of the Tree of Knowledge. If ye do, ye shalt die.
Rhonda knew that Adam and Eve did not die as a result of eating from the Tree of Knowledge…
RHONDA (11 now) watches, puzzled, as the Nun-Teacher finishes writing on the blackboard: KNOWLEDGE IS POWER
Why did God curse the Serpent for telling Eve she should eat from the Tree of Knowledge when you…
Rhonda, its not for you to question the Word of God.
It is too late, however, to stem the flow of questions flooding Rhonda's brain.
It's unfair to serpents.
And so it is that Rhonda's love of snakes is nurtured and grows.
Rhonda looks at snakes in glass cages in a pet store.
Feeling the need to chose between God's opposition to women's education and the Serpent's more liberal views regarding knowledge…
Rhonda looks at a snake shedding its skin; entranced.
…Rhonda sides with serpents. She anticipates some opposition from her mother but is prepared.
Rhonda shows the python to Phyllis, a bandage wrapped around its middle.
She was run over by a car and the Lord asked me to help her in her time of need. Her name is Serpent.
PHYLLIS (BEATIFIC SMILE)
Rhonda (12 years old now) inspects the bottle of Mother's Little Helpers in her hand.
No longer convinced that her mothers' Little Helpers have any role to play in God's Plan Rhonda conducts her first chemical experiment and discovers …
She takes a pill and pops it into her mouth.
… that 'Mothers Little Helpers' can be divided into two categories.
In her bedroom, RHONDA looks at two small boxes - one green, with GO written on it; one red, with STOP written on it. She opens the GO box, takes out a pill, pops it into her mouth.
Her continuing chemical experiments lead her to the discovery of new states of consciousness.
RHONDA, aged 15,'stoned', watches in awe as Serpent, her pet as python, sheds her skin.
I will shed my skin and live forever.
As PHYLLIS prays, RHONDA, starts to shed her clothes. PHYLLIS, her eyes shut, is oblivious to RHONDA'S performance, but MARY (aged 11) opens one eye for a peek and can't help but enjoy what she sees.
And so it is that Rhonda, with the help of her friend, Cheryl, discovers an alternative way to keep her mother's refrigerator stocked.
RHONDA, 15, in a school storage room, performs a strip-tease to the tune of “Jesus loves me this I know” as Cheryl collects money from a group of 16 year old boys. TWO NUNS appear in the doorway and react with horror to the sight of Rhonda dancing in her bra and knickers.
Rhonda's education comes to an abrupt halt. This causes her mother some distress at first but Phyllis' prayers…
PHYLLIS, hands on Rhonda's shoulders, eyes raised to heaven.
…are answered when Rhonda gets her first job…
RHONDA puts food in the refrigerator as she answers PHYLLIS' question.
I’ve got a job in the service industry.
Rhonda, in the briefest of bikinis, pops out of a huge 'cake' singing “Happy Birthday to you…” to the raucous applause of an assembled football team.
That Rhonda is still only 15 years old causes some complications with Child Welfare…
RHONDA, in her bedroom filled with stolen goods is confronted by THREE UNIFORMED POLICEMEN and TWO CHILD WELFARE OFFICERS.
…but it is her re-distribution of goods provided by the Lord that results in her being provided with alternative accommodation…
Juvenile Detention Centre. RHONDA sits beside a teenage boy looking at a page torn from a BMW Mechanics Manual, at a detailed drawing of the BMW door-locking system.
…and an alternative education.
YOUNG CAR THIEF
What you gotta know about the BMW locking system is…
And it is in this alternative accommodation that Venus discovers her unique talent with computers. A talent…
Juvenile Detention Centre Activities room. Under the watchful eye of a WELFARE OFFICER, RHONDA sits in front of a computer. On the screen is the PENTAGON Home Page.
…that makes it possible for her to roam freely inside almost any computer in the world that takes her fancy…
We see RHONDA hack into the computers of Madonna, Michael Jackson, Brad Pitt etc.
By the time she is 18, the now multi-skilled Rhonda is too old to utilize this alternative accommodation any longer and so…
RHONDA walks out of Juvenile Detention Centre, bag in hand.
RHONDA, in Sydney Harbour Bridge-shaped sunglasses, a pink wig and with a 12 foot python wrapped around her scantily clad body, performs an erotic dance in a crowded smoke-filled strip joint. Behind her, a sign: VENUS APHRODITE.
…with her mother and sister still to support and not wishing to destroy Phyllis' faith in God, Rhonda, who has changed her name to Venus Aphrodite, continues to provide…
VENUS/RHONDA greets PHYLLIS at the front door of her house with a big bunch of flowers, a basket full of food and an envelope filled with cash.
And so it is, one day...
VENUS, in the dressing room of the strip club with THREE YOUNG STRIPPERS looks at the TV - on which Tony (BIG TONY) Babbit can be seen pontificating to reporters:
...when she sees Tony Babbit on TV
BIG TONY (on TV)
Only when this great country of ours embraces traditional family families...
...that an idea occurs to her.
VENUS calls the other TWO YOUNG STRIPPERS over, tells them her plan. In a
- VENUS, a photo of Tony Babbit at her side, flicks through a book filled with photos of male actors, stops on one; smiles.
- VENUS,in a motel room, hands a middle aged actor a wad of money and proceeds to shave his head.
- VENUS attaches fake ears to the actor, stripped down to his underwear, so that he now looks very like Big Tony.
- VENUS stands behind a camera on a tripod, signals to ‘BIG TONY’, to take off his underpants. Behind her the TWO YOUNG STRIPPERS start to take their clothes off.
- VENUS speaks on the telephone.
How much would you pay for footage of Tony Babbit dancing naked in a motel room with two teenage high school girls?
48 EXT. NOTCH’S HOUSE. SUNSET
The frozen image of JOSIE’S naked back unfreezes. NOTCH smiles, shakes his head, places the camera back on the table.
CLOSE ON JOSIE
$5,000 it is, Terence. See you in Sydney on Friday, Terence
Looking forward to it, Venus.
…to be continued…
JOSIE smiles triumphantly, punches the air with her fist.
…to be continued…